parentinglife

Since August my stepdaughter started kindergarten. We were kind of worried at first because this year she will officially become a school bus rider. As a parent you cant help but be a worry wart when it comes to your child,be it her safety or her well being. We worried for nothing for she took to the bus like duck to water. She loves going in the school bus.She is one of the first group of kids to be picked up and the 1st group of kids to be dropped off. Daddy loves walking and picking her up at the bus stop.

One time, my husband a police officer just came home in time to pick her up at the bus stop. He was of course in full uniform. We were standing in the corner waiting for the bus stop,people passing by in there respective cars kind of glanced around to see why a cop was standing in the corner. Finally when the bus pulled up the kids were just so happy to be home. Kayla was so glad she saw her daddy and we didn’t notice at first the kids were impressed with my husband because he was a police officer. One of Kayla’s friends which also happens to be our backyard neighbour said to my husband,”nice police officer suit”. She thought my husband was just playing dress up,when her mommy said to her that he really is a police officer. The other kid Kelly also said something to that effect. The remaining kids in the school bus were standing up and looking over to the window side.We didn’t pay any attention to that. It was the following day when my husband was told by the lady bus driver how impressed her riders were.. She said that they could not stop talking about the police officer at the bus stop. That was why they were all standing up to see the police at the bus stop.So from that time on, if husband was just coming home from work he will just keep the uniform on for the kids at the bus stop.Maybe someday one of those kids on that bus may grow up to be an outstanding police officer like my husband.

How does one define being a Stepmom?

I simply put it as the woman who takes the second role of a mom to a non biological child.At least that is how i view myself,not a replacement more of like a substitute in lieu of the absence of the real parent. It hasn’t been easy for me as well as for my stepdaughter. I was fortunate enough to have come into her life at the age where she was more accepting but it will take work and effort. This was a 3 yrs old girl being shuffled from mother to father every other week. When she was with us,her world was mostly all about her daddy and nothing else.I had no place in her world at first. Getting pregnant kind of delayed and put a bump on our journey to acceptance and getting to know each other.For the 1st 3 months i was constantly sick and had bouts of depression due to not being able to eat. It pierced my heart every time i hear her ask only for her daddy and not me. I was not included in anything else unless by invitation from her. When i was finally got better we got a chance to finally bond with the help of the little being that was growing inside of me. She slowly started including me in her drawings,stories and playtime. The day she kissed me on the lips and said i love you was the day she accepted me into her life completely. Before she would only kiss me on the cheeks and never on the lips,that was only reserve for daddy and her mommy. My heart was full of emotions,from relief,love and joy. I have never once asked nor told her to call me “mommy or mama”. She calls me “MENIE”, and it just perfect.

 Today,we still have struggles but nothing that cannot be overcome. I love her with all my heart,she may not have been borne from my womb but she definitely got planted and grew in my heart.Her love for my biological daughter,her baby sister is so pure and unconditional.She loves her with a passion and adores her. It was funny after the baby was born,she was so confused as to who the babies mommy was. It didn’t matter to her,all she knows is that baby sister is and will always be a part of her.As for me, i know my relationship with my stepdaughter will just keep growing stronger and stronger. We have the whole future to look forward to and we will just take one step at a time.